It's KYUEM's birthday today! Happy 7th birthday. Like any 7 year old, this college has still a long way to go. And oh yes, the party we had in the Great Hall was great! There wasn't much to look forward to actually, just the food.The food! That was marvellous. I went with an empty tummy. I was so hungry I could eat a horse. Too bad horses were not one of the dishes. I said to someone the other day that the Students Committee (whom we affectionately call the SC,the committee whom we've voted for and handles all college events) really want us to grow fat. They really do. They have this knack of ensuring everyone would at least gain some 10 kilos before retires to their chalets after each and every college event. They started off with the Nostalgic Night,in which the food was served by some hotel caterer from KL. I always have a hearty appetite, so I wouldn't want to waste all the money spent, so I tasted every single thing on the table, which was a lot. And on that night only, I believe I could have easily gained some 5 kilos. I kid you not!
The second one was Teachers' Day celebration. Well, they were supposed to be serving us with some refreshment,and that was just what they did. Apple danish and egg tarts! Did I ever mention I have a huge appetite? So again, under the pretext that 'membazir itu saudara syaitan', I dutifuly finish up my part. And because Jij did not like the egg tart, I had hers as well. So they you go, my diet will never work.
And tonight, again, the SC have managed to coerce me into abandoning my diet,yet again. I just can't resist the temptation. It was more because I had gone there starving,so it's just natural that everything they have had made my mouth water. With an armful of Domino's Pizza, a slice of Banana Chocolate Cake, sate with the my favourite nasi himpit kuah kacang, I was all set to stuff my face. And it just didn't help that Jij (my partner in crime) and Ida kept offering me this and that. After 1 pizza and cake, diminidhing marginal utility set in. realizing there were still may food uneaten, I only managed to nimble at them very,very slowly. First the sate, then sip some air oren,then the nasi goreng, sip some more air oren and repeat that until there was no more sate in sight. Fuih!
Penat sungguh makan. But one think, unlike other girls who are conscious abot weight and how they look, I 'didn't really feel guilty. I don't know why. There is one little voice in me kept telling me that I had been a bad girl, if I keep overeating, God knows I will never ever start to lose weight. And I am not a teenager anymore (chewah perasan tua) that means I can never lose weight easily anymore. But that was all the voice did, It never actually made me stop eating or diminish my appetite. Oh hell, I would one day consult a doctor if it worries me too much. But as of today, I will not starve myself just to look good. Although I must say that I want to look good, I wish I could wear all those nicely made blouse in the magazines, I want to have that toned body. But the problem is me. I never had the strength to fight this appetite.
Oh to be fair, I did once, but I fell sick. It felt terrible. That was in form 2. I went on skipping my meals for 2 consecutive weeks. I just had Jacobs and Luxury biscuits. For a while, it felt good because I could feel my tummy getting flatter and flatter. But when I started to eat properly again,the food just won't stay in there, it wanted to come out.It got really bad when I had to run to the nearby bathroom after every meal. And when there wasn't really anthing in there,I still had the sickly feeling. Everyone started to notice then, much to my annoyance this time. I kept telling people that the vomiting was not self inflicted although I admitted that I had been skipping my meals. Until there was this one night during drama practice, I blacked out during the script reading. I just had no energy. I was hopitalised for the night. Pakyat (a senior who was also a Kedahan, and the headboy) brought me to see ustazah who later brought me to the hospital.(Someone had told me after I was back the next day). It wasn't fun. In the ward, I couldn't sleep. This nurse kept coming and injecting liquids in me. I suspected that they gave me some appetite booster and when I got back to college, the vomiting did no stop abruptly, but the amazing thing was I always felt hungry and suddenly my appetite was rocketing. I never tried to lose weight ever since. And everyone, including those senior boys who never talked to me before made a point to tell me, "hah, jangan nak diet2 dah, nanti pengsan lagi", everytime I walked pass them to class. It was embarrassing alright. Even the principal, Mr Ramli Maidin, started to be nice to me. You must know that this principal is not everyone's favourite and yet, I had been to his office more than those naughty boys that have been called because of their mischief. But there was another similarity between me and the principal that made the rapport grew, but that was a different story.
They you go, the conclusion is, I ate a lot. My diet is not working.I am feeling like a giantess right about now. Period.
No comments:
Post a Comment